How screwed up is that?

Case Study 5

Byron was arrested upon suspicion of burglary at 12, Shelley Street after a witness named him as the person she saw leaving the property at night carrying a television at around 9.05pm.

Later, Brian was arrested as his fingerprints were found inside the house. They are jointly charged. You represent Byron. In conference, he tells you that that evening, he has 3 alibis;

(a) from 7.45pm-9pm he was burgling 14, Larkin Road, Hackney;
(b) directly after that, he went to Brian's home, knowing that Brian would be at 12, Shelley Street, and had intercourse with Brian's wife, leaving at 10.30pm
(c) from 10.45 to 2.45am he was drinking at the Pgi's Head in Walthamstow.

Draft Byron's defence statement.

WTF?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!??!!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

I'll Be

I'll Be
Edwin McCain
From - Misguided Roses

The strands in your eyes that color them wonderful
Stop me and steal my breath
Emeralds from mountains thrust towards the sky
Never revealing their depth

Tell me that we belong together
Dress it up with the trappings of love
I'll be captivated, I'll hang from your lips
Instead of the gallows of heartache that hang from above

I'll be your cryin' shoulder
I'll be love suicide
I'll be better when I'm older
I'll be the greatest fan of your life

Rain falls angry on the tin roof
As we lie awake in my bed
You're my survival, you're my living proof
My love is alive and not dead

Tell me that we belong together
Dress it up with the trappings of love
I'll be captivated, I'll hang from your lips
Instead of the gallows of heartache that hang from above

I'll be your cryin' shoulder
I'll be love suicide
I'll be better when I'm older
I'll be the greatest fan of your life

I've dropped out, burned up, fought my way back from the dead
Tuned in, turned on, remembered the things you said

I'll be your cryin' shoulder
I'll be love suicide
I'll be better when I'm older
I'll be the greatest fan of your life

*News flash* I have been robbed by a bitch!

You know, there are people out there who are just plain assholes and bitches.

For example, I have been applying for jobs with the possibility of pro-longing my stay in this foreign country. I finally was offered a job interview and I was glad. Unfortunately it clashed with 2 classes, so I asked if it could be rescheduled for another day as it would be extremely difficult for me to attend. The person in charge was not around and I was told she would get back to me as soon as possible.

The following day, I got a call from her colleague in the department informing me that the dates and slots for the interview could not be changed and that the person in charge had given up my slot to somebody else because she was under the impression I would not be able to make it anyway. I concede that I might have given the impression I was unable to attend if it was on Tuesday. But that was MY slot to give away if I absolutely had to and not for her to do so! I feel that I have been treated unfairly as I would definitely have done all in my power to make that interview... and now this careless impulsive bitch took it away without consulting me first!!!I feel as though I have been robbed!! It is unjust to do so and the level of dissapointment reaches magnitudes of dissapointment no scale can ever register. A simple call could have cleared the matter. She should have asked me again if I still wanted the interview. There was absolutely no communication between her and me. How dare she assume!!!! Now that my prospects have gone from some to absolutely zero, I feel like a crushed can. So deflated and unfairly discarded.

BITCH! BITCH! BITCH! BITCH! BITCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I've had an exceptionally stressful week and I slept at 8am preparing for classes and I got the call at 9.50am.. talk about rude awakenings!! FUCK! I AM IN NO MOOD TO BE TREATED LIKE SHIT!! UGHZ! I just told a friend that if another complication like this arises, i.e. within the next week something as shitty as this happens again, I am going to go berzerk and turn into one of those mass murderers and go to the office which screwed up and open fire before turning the gun on myself!!

In the light that I have been so stressed out, it took me great difficulty to be at all civil in my complaint to her. Here's a fragment of the e-mail I sent;

"I would like to express my great dissapointment in
your conduct. You should have talked to me first
before giving my slot to someone else.I don't mean to
be hostile, but I feel that it is greatly unfair on my
part as I had merely asked if I could have the date of
the interview changed.

I understand that I might have given the impression
that I definitely could not attend, but a simple call
could have cleared up the matter. Furthermore, I feel
that it was my slot to give up if I absolutely had to.
Instead of being told that I could only attend an
interview on Tuesday and asked whether or not I could
make it, I was informed that it had been taken away
and had no prospects at all. I would have done
everything I could to attend that interview by
rearranging and rescheduling appointments. I feel as
though a golden opportunity has been yanked from right
under me.

I am very upset that I have been unfairly dropped from
the list of interviewees. Please understand the stress
and dissapointment this has caused me."

Schadenfreude

schadenfreude \SHAHD-n-froy-duh\, noun:
A malicious satisfaction in the misfortunes of others.


Actually, the direct translation from the German term schadenfreude into English is “damage joy” or characterized as “sick pleasure”. Perhaps the more subjective approach to the translation would be that we derive pleasure and delight from the misfortune of others.

I’m here, I am schadenfreude, get used to it! So now that I’m out of the closet, let me tell you something about being schadenfreude. It really isn’t as bad as you think. I’m being honest with myself. I can’t help it if there are some people who can be so stupid. I’ve been told many times now that I’m evil. Well, boo hoo! Live with it! Recently, I was out with a couple of friends, this girl fell flat on her face behind us. I heard the loud thump so I turned around. I don’t know if it’s true or not, but apparently, I had a smile creeping up on my face. What can I say? I can’t help it! However, I’m quite sure that I only suffer from a mild case of it.

I’m not talking about the misfortune of tsunami victims or anything or anyone with misfortunes of such magnitudes. It has to come out of the stupidity of that person. It has got to be caused by his or her own idiocy. For example, deriving pleasure from the fact that your nemesis was scolded for being incompetent… in terms of sick pleasure, what about scaring someone and getting a kick out of it? I think it’s hilarious. It might be one of the oldest ones in the book, but it sure is funny. There was this one time when a friend was late. She apologized profusely and explained that she had fallen on the way. I asked her how she fell, and she explained further that she had slipped on a banana peel. Now, I don’t know if you can see the hilarity of the whole situation, but after she left the table, I could not help but laugh my head off. I didn’t know that people actually slipped on banana peels!!! I know… I’m really mean.

One other thing I like to do is laugh at these videos I've got. You see, I have 2 videos of dance competitions going on. In both, there’s this one clip where you see a girl fall flat on her butt. One was because she tripped over her own feet (now that is so bloody funny! HAHAHAHA). The other, she and her partner completely missed each other so he couldn’t get a hold of her hand in time to balance her. As a result, she tilted too far backwards, with her hand flailing in front of her trying to grab on to anything, and landed flat on her butt.

However, looking at Schadenfreude from a different perspective, it may also mean the feeling of being “Blessed” because no matter how deep in a valley you may seem, there is always someone worse off than ourselves. It is the state of being thankful that it is they instead of us being unfortunate. Ultimately though, it is never used in that sense in German. Instead, it always carries a negative connotation.

Here are just some German quotes on Schadenfreude I found online;

▪ Schadenfreude ist die schönste Freude (denn sie kommt von Herzen). Schadenfreude is the most beautiful kind of joy (since it comes directly from the heart).
▪ Neid zu fühlen ist menschlich, Schadenfreude zu genießen teuflisch. It is human to feel envy, but it is diabolic to enjoy Schadenfreude.

Apparently, the term was used in English long before, but it gained popularity after it was used in a dialoque in an episode of the Simpsons. Here is the extract of conversation between Homer and Lisa;

Lisa: Dad, do you know what Schadenfreude is?
Homer: (sarcastically) No, I do not know what Schadenfreude is. Please tell me, because I'm dying to know!
Lisa: It's a German term for 'shameful joy', taking pleasure in the suffering of others.
Homer: Oh, come on Lisa. I'm just glad to see him fall flat on his butt!

Although Homer apparently does not understand Lisa's explanation, his emotions towards Flanders are precisely what Schadenfreude is. So see, I’m sure everyone of us has a Schadenfreude streak in us. No matter how much you want to deny it, every one of us is a little Schadenfreude. If you found Home Alone 1 funny, you're definitely a little Schadenfreude!!!

p.s. It's no wonder my favourite character in Will & Grace is Karen Walker! Really, the show should be called Karen, or Jack & Karen in the least!

Hues of Purple and Burgundy

Okay, this is going to be so totally unrelated, but anyway, my close friends know that I have very vivid and strange dreams. Here's one that I had this evening;

I remember a great big open space... like an abandoned aerodrome. I was with friends, but no one I know in reality... at least not in the present. Anyway, it was at night. The sky was clear with no clouds. The stars were shining brightly. Beside the aerodrome was a road and opposite were houses. All was calm. There weren't many lights, but the moon was bright so you could see across the open space. We were talking about strange recent occurrences and one that cropped up was the fact witnesses had seen someone or something steal a motorbike (don't ask) by carrying it and running off. It was so strange and eerie at the same time.

Then suddenly, someone pointed up into the sky and shouted for the rest to look. There was a bright purple spot in the sky... one that grew by the seconds. It looked like hues of purple and burgundy.... like when the sun sets and the clouds in the sky turn reddish-purple. It looked like that and the colours moved as though they were alive. But as they grew bigger, it became more apparent that they were actually metal falling to the ground. It came crashing onto the aerodrome and I remember seeing parts of motorbikes falling around me.

It was one freaky dream. I felt scared and so alone and helpless. Imagine being there. At night, witnessing the whole incident... very sci-fi, but just imagine how you'd feel. Huge pieces of metal falling from the sky... engulfed in hues of purple and burgundy... as though they were really hot... and everything started from this tiny spec in the sky. Weird huh?

bleks...  

Me and Tim saw a bright white light...  

Out clubbing. Only had camera phones to work with... still, it was one wild night.  

Matthew Shepard

These are extracts from Dennis Shepard's statements to the court at the trial for sentence of Aaron McKinney in the case of R v McKinney on November 4, 1999 ;

"Matt loved people and he trusted them. He could never understand how one person could hurt another, physically or verbally. They would hurt him, and he would give them another chance. This quality of seeing only good gave him friends around the world. He didn’t see size, race, intelligence, sex, religion, or the hundred other things that people use to make choices about people. All he saw was the person. All he wanted was to make another person his friend. All he wanted was to make another person feel good. All he wanted was to be accepted as an equal.

Matt officially died at 12:53 a.m. on Monday, October 12, 1998, in a hospital in Fort Collins, Colorado. He actually died on the outskirts of Laramie tied to a fence that Wednesday before, when you beat him. You, Mr. McKinney, with your friend Mr. Henderson, killed my son. By the end of the beating, his body was just trying to survive. You left him out there by himself, but he wasn’t alone. There were his lifelong friends with him—friends that he had grown up with. You’re probably wondering who these friends were.

First, he had the beautiful night sky with the same stars and moon that we used to look at through a telescope. Then, he had the daylight and the sun to shine on him one more time—one more cool, wonderful autumn day in Wyoming. His last day alive in Wyoming. His last day alive in the state that he always proudly called home. And through it all he was breathing in for the last time the smell of Wyoming sagebrush and the scent of pine trees from the snowy range. He heard the wind—the ever-present Wyoming wind—for the last time. He had one more friend with him. One he grew to know through his time in Sunday school and as an acolyte at St. Mark’s in Casper as well as through his visits to St. Matthew’s in Laramie. He had God. I feel better knowing he wasn’t alone.

Matt became a symbol—some say a martyr, putting a boy-next-door face on hate crimes. That’s fine with me. Matt would be thrilled if his death would help others.

Matt’s beating, hospitalization, and funeral focused worldwide attention on hate. Good is coming out of evil. People have said “Enough is enough.” You screwed up, Mr. McKinney. You made the world realize that a person’s lifestyle is not a reason for discrimination, intolerance, persecution, and violence. This is not the 1920s, 30s, and 40s of Nazi Germany. My son died because of your ignorance and intolerance. I can’t bring him back. But I can do my best to see that this never, ever happens to another person or another family again. As I mentioned earlier, my son has become a symbol—a symbol against hate and people like you; a symbol for encouraging respect for individuality; for appreciating that someone is different; for tolerance. I miss my son, but I’m proud to be able to say that he is my son.

I, too, believe in the death penalty. I would like nothing better than to see you die, Mr. McKinney. However,this is the time to begin the healing process. To show mercy to someone who refused to show any mercy. To use this as the first step in my own closure about losing Matt.

You robbed me of something very precious, and I will never forgive you for that. Mr. McKinney, I give you life in the memory of one who no longer lives. May you have a long life, and may you thank Matthew every day for it."

May he rest in peace...